Things My Mother Taught Me

Things My Mother Taught Me
  • Don’t play with fire. (After I put my hand on the stove.)
  • Don’t pick on your sisters. (After Sarah bit me.)
  • Cooking peanuts in the microwave does not make peanut butter. (After I used all the peanuts.)
  • Don’t put things on your head. (After I ran into the wall wearing a plastic bucket.)
  • Don’t pick on your brothers. (After Andy peed on us.)
  • Locking your brothers in the closet is not babysitting. (Tattle Tellers!)
  • Don’t bring mud in the house. (After we played “drive-thru” with mud through her bedroom window.)
  • No kissing boys. (So I chased them out of the yard with sticks.)
  • Wear your clothes properly. (After I ran into a tree with a dress over my head.)
  • What goes around comes around. (When I had kids that didn’t listen.)
  • Watch your mouth. (After Sarah bit me again!)
  • Pay Attention. (After I shot myself in the foot with a BB Gun.)
  • Think before you act. (After I cut myself trying to slice a frozen rhubarb pie.)
  • Some things are not edible. (After eating grass.)
  • Tying your brothers up is not babysitting. (Tattle Tellers!)
  • Share. (So I ‘shared’ by stealing all Sarah’s clothes.)
  • Don’t Steal. (Stop biting me Sarah!)
  • Actions Speak Louder than Words. (Why we locked our brothers in the closet.)
  • Be Kind & Loving. (Which is why we still love each other.)
My Mom did teach us many wonderful things, but I wanted to put a humorous spin on it. We love you Mom! And also have no idea how you put up with us. Although, it was all Sarah’s fault anyway!


  1. jill24295 says:

    Aww… made me smile. Love this!

  2. DealinandDishin says:

    I love it!!
    I’m always amazed what stunt my kids will pull

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